1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
Dismiss Notice
Hey Guest!
The donation button is here.
https://goo.gl/aFggcs
Baraka_Guru
Last Activity:
Aug 26, 2020
Joined:
Jul 14, 2011
Messages:
12,247
Trophy Points:
123
Positive ratings received:
9,822
Neutral ratings received:
0
Negative ratings received:
0

Post Ratings

Received: Given:
Like 9,812 7,731
Dislike 0 0
Agree 3 0
Disagree 0 0
Funny 3 3
Winner 3 4
Informative 1 0
Lovely 0 0
Useful 0 0
Optimistic 0 1
Creative 0 0
Old 0 0
Bad Spelling 0 0
Dumb 0 0
Like - Tilted Back 2 0
Dislike - Tilted Back 0 0
Funny - Tilted Back 0 0
Winner - Tilted Back 0 0
Love it  - Tilted Back 0 0
Gender:
Male
Location:
Toronto
Occupation:
Editor

Baraka_Guru

Möderätor, Male, from Toronto

Staff Member Donor

Oh, hi! Nov 12, 2018

Baraka_Guru was last seen:
Aug 26, 2020
    1. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      My poem name is Onomatopoeia Enjambment.
    2. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Wheat germ: that nutritious stuff health nuts steal from kids who eat Wonder Bread.
    3. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      All right, I guess September is going to be really busy too. That's fine. I can really use it.
    4. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      I just learned about something called a skull brightener. Cool!
    5. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      I'm still confused as to why people insist on typesetting books like websites.
      1. snowy
        snowy
        I see many nonfiction books with modern typefaces I don't like in books. Give me Garamond any day. Websites: sans serif. Books: serif.
        Sep 6, 2011
      2. Baraka_Guru
        Baraka_Guru
        Books with sans serif text and/or paragraphs with no indents divided by line spaces screams: SELF-PUBLISHED!
        Sep 7, 2011
    6. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Life is too short to spend your time reading overwritten, meandering books.
    7. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      I'm going to have to start finding at least 3,800 calories in my day.
    8. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Who knew that The Secret History of the Mongols would make such a great interview guide....?
    9. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      I know you're probably busy and probably make more in day than I do in a week, but we have a fucking book go to print....
    10. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Deeply saddened by the loss of Jack Layton.
    11. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Cirque de Soleil!
    12. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      9er: Why don't you offer me Midol while you're at it?
    13. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Could really use shiatsu right now.
    14. Baraka_Guru
    15. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      I won't be reading as much tomorrow, but I'll be indexing!
    16. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      My inbox is filled with hundreds of pages.
    17. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      OMG...so...many....adverbs.....
    18. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      I suppose I better start getting ready for the big solar storms, magnetic pole reversal, earthquakes, supervolcanoes, or whatever is coming.
    19. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Sometimes I feel like the only sane person in a world full of crazies who don't know what a fucking comma is used for. /editor rage
    20. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Hitting the "proofreading slalom" stage of the editorial season. Yes!
  • Loading...
  • Loading...
  • About

    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Toronto
    Occupation:
    Editor
    The details of my life are quite inconsequential. But very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical — summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring, we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds — pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it —

    Signature

    “I can't remember anything. I remember only ideas and sensations.”
    —James Joyce, Ulysses (1922)
    “Humankind cannot bear very much reality.”
    —T. S. Eliot, “Burnt Norton,” Four Quartets (1943)