Issues with new girl

Who you calling a bra ?!

Weren't you the one that wrote some guide to picking up girls or something? I thought you were a guy for the longest time, then apparently you are a girl. Weird.

 

Hey, now... just because I don't have a penis doesn't make me a girl.

Anyway, I was just commenting on the utterly asinine zinger used by many slack jawed finger sniffers that women that engage in an increased level sexual activity are somehow sporting loose pleasure ports. Science! has proven that is totally not the case. Turns out you can have a female partner with a high sexual body count that smashes your turgid trooper like a set of flesh-coated Vise Grips. I've had experienced sex partners that Kegel'd their way to giving me a whole new kind of rear naked choke. I just wanted to point out the poor form in your comment, old chap.

Especially in this subforum, where we like to talk about sex and work to avoid all the "bitches 'n sluts" banter.

 

Did you just say you had sex with girls, and before that you said you don't have a penis?
--- merged: Aug 16, 2011 at 1:17 AM ---
Also -- really need to get my gf to learn kegels.. its not feeling so awesome so far

 

Definitely not to toot my own horn, but I've been on TFP for more than a hot weekend now. Where have you been?

My smoothspot is nearly a modern day legend. Men envy it. Women want it. Zombies fear it.

/threadjack

 

Umm... my post count was not high - definitely lurked more than posted .

But right now I picture you as some sort of alien.. from thailand. No offense.

 

That's as close as any guess I've heard before. And I've met Plan9. Just picture him as a fully armed Thai alien with mad MS Paint skillz.

 

I'd be more worried about how many people she's played scrabble with.
Or table tennis.

Seriously, a fuck is a fuck, feelings are what count.
Is she still desperately pining for #14? If not, no big deal.
As for the size of the sausage, pfft. The most important sex organ a woman has is her brain.
If you turn her mind on, the rest doesn't matter all that much.

A bigger problem I read between the lines might be that she's used to a very active social life, lots of friends, out drinking with them, and if you are shy you might not be comfortable with joining her social life and she'd feel caged to have to give it up.

 

There were multiple name changes involved, but no, Plan9 as you are speaking to him was not the same Plan9 who "wrote" the festring sore on the old TFP that was that "how to get girls" thread.

And I am certain that referring to this current Plan9 as "him" is correct. Plan9's GI-Joe-style smooth spot is a long-running gag.

edit: damn, I feel like the kid who spoils the end of the movie for that last bit.

 

That's why I prefer my transexual alien with an arsenal picture.

 

Ahhh thank you for that clarification - and no it was not that exciting to deserve the movie metaphor (ok it was a bit)
--- merged: Aug 16, 2011 at 10:59 PM ---

 

that banter is slightly comforting though. as much as we "intellectuals" *wipes drool away* like to look down on that sort of speak, it's a bittersweet reality check that not everyone wants to be as accepting as the majority of we in the TFP are

 

Plan9, you remind me a hell-of-a-lot of a member of my previous forum. Called P.Ness. You'd get along with her.

I completely agree with Flatland Flyer's mentality on the number issue. I am the same. Though, I will lay it out as follows:

You screwed yourself with your adventures over the past 2 years. I do believe if you only had 2-3 partners in your life, you can expect a low count from your future potential partner as well without being seen as unreasonable. Dipping your boner in 12 women in such a short timespan only worked against your own mentality. In all honesty, deal with the idea of having partners who got done by whole football teams.

On another note, I always found anyone who stayed friends with their ex's very peculiar. Wouldn't consider someone like that for a second, simply due to the whole range of unlikely-yet-possible situations that pop up with continued friendship, especially if it is one based on trust. There's all sorts of situations where one can lose composure and/or control. I like Poetry's self-confidence and, no matter how unlikely, she may very well be one of those very few people able to always be 100% in control of themselves; whom do not lose themselves in emotions and never wish to confide to their ex/friend over a glass of wine/vodka her sorrows. However, how can your partner be certain? I find your dismissal of a legitimate concern with the "responsible adult" label extremely weak, as your ability remains unproven until observed/monitored directly in such situations. Ipso facto, your partner is never able to possess reliable knowledge of your loyalty and, subsequently, has the right to question the amount of partners you had, what sexual practices you participated in, and you being friends with people you had sexual relations with. All of this without you being in a position to act dismissive.

Same applies to the "things I did when I didn't even know him" phrase: Contrary to popular belief, your past actions are not beyond reproach. Any action taken and decision made as an adult can and should be considered part and/or indicative of your personality, behavioural pattern and intrinsic characteristics. As a consequence, when somebody evaluates you as a potential partner, your past should be taken into account to determine how appealing as a long-term partner you truly are.

It's obvious I never learned to appreciate the self-aware, adult and sexually-apprehensive portion of the population.